This post accidentally posted earlier this month. I am re posting on its original schedule date.
Tomorrow is my birthday.
While the day used to be focused on which bakery in town would be supplying my sugar laden birthday cake and what they picked out for me these days I am just happy to be surrounded by those I love.
Right before Christmas I was woken to chirping fire detectors at 5:00 am. Nora was panicking. She’s very sensitive to the sound. Before she became our forever dog she survived a fire in the family home where she lived. The fire detectors really bother her.
And I know that.
She has a doggie door and after the third round of them ringing she bolted. Through her door. But she was not in a good frame of mind and apparently it took me until about 7:30 am to realize she had not come back in. In her panic she got out of the yard.
I live in a pretty even keel place these days. My anxiety runs low and I am pretty calm about most things. She’s gotten out before but she always comes back quickly. This was too long. And she missed breakfast.
It was a tough day. My dad had been readmitted to the hospital and I was due to pick my sister up at the airport. The girls needed rides. And I would not be home for hours.
Stress level was high.
I went to that dark place of what could have happened to her. I found myself driving around our neighborhood stopping to ask anyone out there if they had seen her. It was clear I was upset.
I tried to get on with my day knowing the Mr. would be home.
Then about 11 am I got this photo on my phone
Animal Control knew she was missing and called the Mr. when she was found.
Look at that guilt ridden face. The Mr. tells me that animal control let her sit in the front seat because she was so sweet.
Later that night she never left my side.
I felt an enormous sense of loss that morning. It was painful. And to have her back taught me a lesson.
Life is not about where your cake comes from or what gifts you got for Christmas. It’s about having my family around me.
And the realization that time is marching on and they may not all always be here. That my girls are still young enough that they are home with me and not at college yet or starting their own family traditions. That my parents are now well into their 80s.
My dad missed Christmas but is home from the hospital and my sister is back where she lives. I wake up to that black face so happy to see me every morning. She is my family.
That is what I celebrate this year for my 47th.
Ugh… did I just type that?